They Must Think I’m Nuts

I’ve made up my mind that I’m going to eat sugar—anything I want—during the three or four days between Halloween and my birthday and then quit again for the remainder of 2006 and into 2007.

Creating this ritual allows me to eat sweets (which I really don’t want to give up) while also avoiding them all year long. It also doesn’t glorify sweets for me as I have to jam them all into a short window and I’ll no doubt over eat, binge, and feel like crap afterwards.

So that’s my plan.

Yesterday I was invited to attend a small and exclusive storytelling workshop. The thing is, it falls on the weekend between Halloween and my birthday. I said no and added, “That’s my sugar weekend.” They must’ve thought I’m nuts. It sounds so, “I’ve got to do laundry,” or, “I’ve got to wash my hair.”

But it’s true!

They prodded me, “Can’t you eat sugar the weekend before, or after?”

“No.”

Perhaps they don’t have a personal ritual. If it was a religious thing they’d understand. If it were job related there’s be no questioning. But I’m going to be eating sweets and it’s going to be an event. It’ll be an extravaganza!

I’m going to be doing it big with photos and a written log of how I feel. Maybe I’ll make a movie. I’m going to eat more than I can handle. I’m going to load up to say the least. It’s not gonna be pretty and it HAS TO HAPPEN on those specific days for it to fit into my ritual and effectively keep me off sugar the rest of the year.

By allowing myself to eat on those days, it lifts the burden through the rest of the year. I really like sweets. I miss chocolate. I WANT to eat all those things but several things keep me from doing so. They are:

1. This website.

2. You’re watching me!

3. I made a commitment to myself.

4. Eating sweets will make me feel bad and reinvigorate the cycle of sweet induced highs and lows.

So in any case, I’m not doing anything that weekend but eating sugar. Consider it my own private church. Consider it work-related.

That’s what I’m going to do.

Previous/Next Post